Tell It Like It Is

Jay Tell: I am a FAR-LEFT ULTRA-LIBERAL (is there any other kind?) who wants the IRS to steal your money and give it to lazy brown-skinned people who speak gibberish, hate work and wipe their asses with American flags. I believe that a search for real values begins in Hollywood and ends in San Francisco. If you need to see a doctor for a gushing wound, I believe that you should be put on a government waiting list until all the illegals have been given free medical care. I don't believe in God but I do believe in Obama, the true Messiah. I believe that guns belong only in the hands of jack-booted ATF thugs. I am a card-carrying member of the Blame America First Crowd. I believe that instead of reciting the Pledge, public school students should be forced by unionized teachers to don berets, sniff artisanal cheese, and shout "Vive la France!" And I believe in the day when unmarked UN-INTERPOL helicopters will swoop into Washington to impose One World Gay Socialist Government. Swarms of black choppers (with their payload of cold-blooded Belgian shock troops) will darken our skies as soon as single-payer health care is adopted, but shhh!!!, don't give away their cue! Amen.

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